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Well, actually there will be two words, because I'm an over achiever like that. I'm only sharing one right now because the other is still a concept and I can't think of the right word to sum it up. This is not nearly as lofty as it sounds - really it's more a shortfall in my vocabulary than anything else! The oldest could probably come up with the right word, and the middle one could probably make up a word, but I'll just wait and see if I can figure it out myself first!
The word I do have now ... is LAUGH. I can be a bit high strung. Just a bit. I like to have all of my ducks in a row, be where I'm supposed to be when I'm supposed to be there, and have everything done appropriately and cleaned up after. My children sometimes make this a little difficult, like walking out the door and "I can't find my shoes" and "She hit me" and "I'm going to leave every one of the 237894 pieces of this thing I should not have taken out of the house all over the place so that when you're ready to leave, you won't get to because I'm going to be nowhere to be found and you're going to have to gather up all of those pieces" and the ever popular "OH MY SWEET HEAVENS, HAVE YOU BRUSHED YOUR TEETH?"
In the midst of all of this, the MOM FACE pops out more often than not. Then I'm snapping at kids and I'm again reminded that since being in my 40's, my bad attitudes tend to last all day. I remember Beth Moore saying "God doesn't just want to change your life, He wants to change your day" and that's fabulous but I'm JUST. SO. IRRITATED. and don't want to let go of the bad attitude, thankyouverymuch.
So laugh ...
Really I just want to try to loosen up some. I'm always telling one of my children to loosen up, and as that child has a personality SO MUCH like my own, I have realized that I need to do it too. I know I'm still going to get irritated when I'm supposed to be somewhere in FOUR MINUTES and there is still a child playing a video game, barefooted with unbrushed teeth, or any of the other millions of things that irritate me, but truth be told ...
... it's really SMALL STUFF, and in the grand scheme of things, doesn't really matter.
So, I'm going to try to loosen up a bit. And laugh more. Life is funny. My kids are funny. I want to enjoy that. And maybe I'll be so busy laughing that I won't care so much if I'm a couple of minutes late. (I promise I will still care whether teeth are brushed or not though, because that's just gross.)
Showing posts with label Melanie's Deep Thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Melanie's Deep Thoughts. Show all posts
Monday, January 6, 2014
Friday, December 2, 2011
Home Again, and Giggling
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First, thank you all for the concern and prayers regarding my last post. I really am doing okay, it's just that some days are hard. I know you all know what I mean.
We got home safely, and I really just have a minute to post, but I am totally giggling and have to share.
Our Christmas ornaments have been through a lot. Some have been through several moves, and most were not top quality to begin with. I started a series of Disney ornaments about 19 years ago with the intention of saving them up and then giving them to my nephew when he was old enough to have his own tree.
Not gonna happen. Sorry, nephew.
These ornaments really were so cute to start out. Various Disney characters, brightly colored and cheery. Through the years though, well, they have shown some wear and tear.
My oldest commented that opening the Christmas decoration box is a combination of Christmas and Halloween all in one. Peter Pan is missing an arm. Scrooge McDuck is missing a leg. The number of intact dalmations is way less than 101. The worst off is poor Snow White. I am not sure what the dwarfs did to her, but she is missing a head. (The only dwarf that is still here is grumpy. 'Nuff said.)
Now I can't stop giggling at the Christmas/Halloween tree.
At least it looks really pretty when it's dark and the lights are on!
(And yes, pictures are to come. My memory card is full of pics from our trip and I've been afraid to get them off because I'm hoping that the perfect Christmas card pic is on there, and I don't want to be disappointed!)
We got home safely, and I really just have a minute to post, but I am totally giggling and have to share.
Our Christmas ornaments have been through a lot. Some have been through several moves, and most were not top quality to begin with. I started a series of Disney ornaments about 19 years ago with the intention of saving them up and then giving them to my nephew when he was old enough to have his own tree.
Not gonna happen. Sorry, nephew.
These ornaments really were so cute to start out. Various Disney characters, brightly colored and cheery. Through the years though, well, they have shown some wear and tear.
My oldest commented that opening the Christmas decoration box is a combination of Christmas and Halloween all in one. Peter Pan is missing an arm. Scrooge McDuck is missing a leg. The number of intact dalmations is way less than 101. The worst off is poor Snow White. I am not sure what the dwarfs did to her, but she is missing a head. (The only dwarf that is still here is grumpy. 'Nuff said.)
Now I can't stop giggling at the Christmas/Halloween tree.
At least it looks really pretty when it's dark and the lights are on!
(And yes, pictures are to come. My memory card is full of pics from our trip and I've been afraid to get them off because I'm hoping that the perfect Christmas card pic is on there, and I don't want to be disappointed!)
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Six Months.
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It has been six months since the tornadoes in Joplin, Missouri. That means it's been six months since my brother died. It seems like yesterday and also like such a long time.
I hadn't seen Troy since the summer of 2006, when my grandmother died. His health had been bad for the past eight-ish years, something like that.
In 2009, his health took a serious turn for the worse, and we expected that he would not survive. At that time, I had a ton of stuff going on at home. I was a single mother for all intents and purposes because Jim was in Afghanistan. I couldn't just take off and go. Then Troy got better, against the odds. He kind of did that several times.
Then the urgency of going to visit went away. He got better and the "last time" and the "say goodbye" didn't seem as pressing. We talked on the phone a few times, and I have an email from him which still makes me giggle. He knew Jim was gone and told me to let him know if I needed anything. :)
When Jim got back, life kind of took over again and we just didn't make plans to visit. I desperately wish now that we would have.
This last week, I have been remembering silly things. Games we used to play - our house in Nashville had a hall that was completely dark if we closed the doors. We did this silly charades in the dark type game. I remember the BRIGHT red carpet in his bedroom in that house. Last week I got a couple of boxes of old stuff out of my old bedroom at my parents' house and remembered him out there listening to Bill Cosby and Howie Mandel records. I remember him watching Spies Like Us over and over and laughing hysterically through the whole thing. And OH MY HEAVENS, his son Tommy? So many mannerisms of Troy. Things he says and does ... it's a little freaky. And very cool. I would have never remembered Troy singing and dancing (a little strangely) to some old Michael Jackson song until I saw Tommy do it just last weekend. And this is a blessing. :)
And now it's Thanksgiving. Really, I'm not feeling all that thankful. I have regrets for not doing things because the cost to me was perceived to be too high. And then ... to survive all that he did and be killed by a tornado? That doesn't make sense to me. So, I am partly a little angry.
Then again, I am SO thankful. We had a perfect childhood. I have great memories. I see my childhood family somewhat mirrored in my own. I have faith that one day this WILL make sense. So as I sit here in a dark house in the rain, far from home and far from my parents, I'm trying to let the thankful things outweigh the "want to pitch a fit and say this is unfair" things.
And right now? I think that's good enough.
I hadn't seen Troy since the summer of 2006, when my grandmother died. His health had been bad for the past eight-ish years, something like that.
In 2009, his health took a serious turn for the worse, and we expected that he would not survive. At that time, I had a ton of stuff going on at home. I was a single mother for all intents and purposes because Jim was in Afghanistan. I couldn't just take off and go. Then Troy got better, against the odds. He kind of did that several times.
Then the urgency of going to visit went away. He got better and the "last time" and the "say goodbye" didn't seem as pressing. We talked on the phone a few times, and I have an email from him which still makes me giggle. He knew Jim was gone and told me to let him know if I needed anything. :)
When Jim got back, life kind of took over again and we just didn't make plans to visit. I desperately wish now that we would have.
This last week, I have been remembering silly things. Games we used to play - our house in Nashville had a hall that was completely dark if we closed the doors. We did this silly charades in the dark type game. I remember the BRIGHT red carpet in his bedroom in that house. Last week I got a couple of boxes of old stuff out of my old bedroom at my parents' house and remembered him out there listening to Bill Cosby and Howie Mandel records. I remember him watching Spies Like Us over and over and laughing hysterically through the whole thing. And OH MY HEAVENS, his son Tommy? So many mannerisms of Troy. Things he says and does ... it's a little freaky. And very cool. I would have never remembered Troy singing and dancing (a little strangely) to some old Michael Jackson song until I saw Tommy do it just last weekend. And this is a blessing. :)
And now it's Thanksgiving. Really, I'm not feeling all that thankful. I have regrets for not doing things because the cost to me was perceived to be too high. And then ... to survive all that he did and be killed by a tornado? That doesn't make sense to me. So, I am partly a little angry.
Then again, I am SO thankful. We had a perfect childhood. I have great memories. I see my childhood family somewhat mirrored in my own. I have faith that one day this WILL make sense. So as I sit here in a dark house in the rain, far from home and far from my parents, I'm trying to let the thankful things outweigh the "want to pitch a fit and say this is unfair" things.
And right now? I think that's good enough.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
The Prize
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We've had some interesting discussions at our house over the past couple of weeks, mainly revolving around marriage and what our plans are for our children as one of them is growing up so quickly. It's been interesting talking with her and seeing where her heart is in this.
I would love for my kids to just bypass all of that dating garbage. I would love for them to dream of marriage and to be able to enter into that relationship with no regrets and no baggage from previous relationships. I would love for them to build friendships and see where the Lord may lead those friendships. I would love for them to seek the Lord in all of their steps.
I'm still trying to cement my thoughts here, but as my mind has been dwelling on this topic, and on how to direct my children as they're getting older, I remembered (with the help of my mom) a discussion with the middle one a few years ago.
Mom had taken the girls shopping and let them pick out something. The middle one wanted a bridal gown. She was so cute, and of course mom bought her what she wanted. We were talking with her about it and she was telling us all about her wedding. I asked her what music she would choose.
She said that her song would be ...
Here comes the prize.
Mom and I just about died. So absolutely precious and absolutely hysterical, and if you know my middle one, so very her.
But you know what? She IS a prize. Right now, she is my prize. One day, I'm sure, some young man is going to take her away from me, but for now, she's all mine.
I would love for my kids to just bypass all of that dating garbage. I would love for them to dream of marriage and to be able to enter into that relationship with no regrets and no baggage from previous relationships. I would love for them to build friendships and see where the Lord may lead those friendships. I would love for them to seek the Lord in all of their steps.
I'm still trying to cement my thoughts here, but as my mind has been dwelling on this topic, and on how to direct my children as they're getting older, I remembered (with the help of my mom) a discussion with the middle one a few years ago.
Mom had taken the girls shopping and let them pick out something. The middle one wanted a bridal gown. She was so cute, and of course mom bought her what she wanted. We were talking with her about it and she was telling us all about her wedding. I asked her what music she would choose.
She said that her song would be ...
Here comes the prize.
Mom and I just about died. So absolutely precious and absolutely hysterical, and if you know my middle one, so very her.
But you know what? She IS a prize. Right now, she is my prize. One day, I'm sure, some young man is going to take her away from me, but for now, she's all mine.
 |
| Here comes the prize! |
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
This HAD to be shared.
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I had a post written for today but after reading one on another blog yesterday, had to postpone mine so I could share this one.
Y'all know I how I love me some Ann Voskamp. I just love her perspective on life and am constantly challenged when reading her blog to look for the beauty in the ordinary.
This post from yesterday really spoke to me. Screamed at me, really.
I just can't even put into words. Looking at my own 12 year old who is just so grown up ...
The days are numbered.
I don't want to miss a one.
Now go read Ann's post if you haven't already. Then realize that the days are indeed numbered, and go enjoy every single one of them.
Y'all know I how I love me some Ann Voskamp. I just love her perspective on life and am constantly challenged when reading her blog to look for the beauty in the ordinary.
This post from yesterday really spoke to me. Screamed at me, really.
I just can't even put into words. Looking at my own 12 year old who is just so grown up ...
The days are numbered.
I don't want to miss a one.
Now go read Ann's post if you haven't already. Then realize that the days are indeed numbered, and go enjoy every single one of them.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
The Conference - Mom Heart by Sally Clarkson
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Finally! I'm going to blog about the Mom Heart conference!
I came home and people asked me to tell them about it and I found that I couldn't. There wasn't a whole lot of processing time during the conference, and then we got home and hit the ground running.
The theme of the conference was perfect for me though: My Mom Heart Matters. Sally Clarkson is a fabulous speaker, very engaging and very real. THOROUGHLY enjoyed her! I think I would have totally loved to sit down and enjoy a cup of tea with her!
One of the areas in which I struggle is feeling like I don't matter. I'm the maid, the nurse, the cook, the nanny, and the teacher. All of this is fine, but it's so easy to get bogged down in all of the STUFF and not take care of myself and then get all resentful. Not only that, but somehow I've bought into the lie that I MUST do all of this stuff, and taking care of myself is fine as long as it doesn't interfere with the important stuff that I have to do. Somewhere along the line I convinced myself that it is selfish to take a few minutes for myself. I totally get that it can become a selfish thing, but it's okay to get up in the morning and enjoy a cup of coffee and sit in a quiet house.
Someone just recently told me that our children are not going to grow up and say "hey! You know what? My mom was always on top of the laundry! That is what I appreciate about my mom!" (Although - I do have to say - my grandmother was a STELLAR dishwasher packer. I have inherited that fine skill. So maybe there will be some appreciation for my laundry ability to trickle down. Beside the point though!) I don't want to be so bogged down in the STUFF that I can't enjoy my life. The laundry will always be there - just today I got every bit of it sorted, washed, dried, folded, and put away, and guess what. The laundry basket is filled again. Such is life.
So ... my takeaway from the conference? I matter. My heart for my family matters. It's okay if I leave the laundry some days and just relax and laugh at the silly antics of the kids, or sit and read a book. Yeah, I know it still all has to be done, but maybe if I can relax a little, then when it has to be done, I'll be refreshed enough to enjoy it, or at least get through it with a happy heart.
(I will never be refreshed enough to enjoy vacuuming. Just saying. There is no refreshment in the world that would make vacuuming enjoyable. Unless my vacuum cleaner starts spouting out Vera Bradley bags and camera lenses, I will always detest vacuuming and will pass that task off to someone else in the family.)
Okay, there are two more points that she hit during the conference that I want to blog about. I think this is long enough for today though, so that will have to wait until tomorrow.
I came home and people asked me to tell them about it and I found that I couldn't. There wasn't a whole lot of processing time during the conference, and then we got home and hit the ground running.
The theme of the conference was perfect for me though: My Mom Heart Matters. Sally Clarkson is a fabulous speaker, very engaging and very real. THOROUGHLY enjoyed her! I think I would have totally loved to sit down and enjoy a cup of tea with her!
One of the areas in which I struggle is feeling like I don't matter. I'm the maid, the nurse, the cook, the nanny, and the teacher. All of this is fine, but it's so easy to get bogged down in all of the STUFF and not take care of myself and then get all resentful. Not only that, but somehow I've bought into the lie that I MUST do all of this stuff, and taking care of myself is fine as long as it doesn't interfere with the important stuff that I have to do. Somewhere along the line I convinced myself that it is selfish to take a few minutes for myself. I totally get that it can become a selfish thing, but it's okay to get up in the morning and enjoy a cup of coffee and sit in a quiet house.
Someone just recently told me that our children are not going to grow up and say "hey! You know what? My mom was always on top of the laundry! That is what I appreciate about my mom!" (Although - I do have to say - my grandmother was a STELLAR dishwasher packer. I have inherited that fine skill. So maybe there will be some appreciation for my laundry ability to trickle down. Beside the point though!) I don't want to be so bogged down in the STUFF that I can't enjoy my life. The laundry will always be there - just today I got every bit of it sorted, washed, dried, folded, and put away, and guess what. The laundry basket is filled again. Such is life.
So ... my takeaway from the conference? I matter. My heart for my family matters. It's okay if I leave the laundry some days and just relax and laugh at the silly antics of the kids, or sit and read a book. Yeah, I know it still all has to be done, but maybe if I can relax a little, then when it has to be done, I'll be refreshed enough to enjoy it, or at least get through it with a happy heart.
(I will never be refreshed enough to enjoy vacuuming. Just saying. There is no refreshment in the world that would make vacuuming enjoyable. Unless my vacuum cleaner starts spouting out Vera Bradley bags and camera lenses, I will always detest vacuuming and will pass that task off to someone else in the family.)
Okay, there are two more points that she hit during the conference that I want to blog about. I think this is long enough for today though, so that will have to wait until tomorrow.
Thursday, February 10, 2011
This is the Stuff
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What a crazy couple of days!
Three children had dental appointments this week. We went on Tuesday, signed in, and the sweet receptionist gave me "that look" like "um, why are you here? I do not have appointments for your children today." She was right. Oops. Appointments were not Tuesday, they were Wednesday. Alrighty.
We show up on again on Wednesday. We left the appointments with one child just fine, one with two minor cavities, and one with a referral to an oral surgeon. Faaaaabulous. If you know my kids, I'm sure you can guess which is which, because that seems to be always the way it works around here.
Is the oral surgeon in our network? Ha. Haha.
So I'm forseeing a child who is surprisingly not in pain yet, but soon will be. I'm also forseeing financial destruction. Okay, that's a *bit* of an exaggeration. Our insurance will cover some of it and there are sufficient funds to cover the rest without eating too many servings of beans and rice over the next few weeks.
So today I get out of bed really early feeling kind of yucky. There's not time for that though! Need to take the little one to preschool, need to meet with a friend for a little while, need to grab the girls and go to the little one's Valentine's party, and hello? SOME schoolwork needs to be done. Oh, and I guess we need to eat and then rush off to consult with the oral surgeon. My cost estimate was off. By a lot. And not in the good way. We get home just in time to get the girls to dance and oh yeah, they have choir tonight too and you CANNOT see my floor and the sink? It would probably be easier to just get water out of the bathroom sink if you're thirsty because there are too many dishes to fit a cup under the tap. And the laundry is piled up? Again? Didn't I just do that? AND WHY, OH HEAVENS WHY, IS THE BATHTUB NOT DRAINING??
May I just have a nap? Please?
And through it all? I found out that I won one of the giveaways on Gussy's blog, something pretty will be coming to my house soon! My friend said "let me just keep your son for an extra hour or two." Jim said "hey, let's go out to dinner tonight." Another friend just plain encouraged my socks off. The girls are sitting here finishing up schoolwork, and giggling. And, our tax refund will be here right when we need to pay for the dental work. I shopped Kohl's clearance sale and bought an $80 jacket for me for $6.99 and it got here today and I LOVE it.
As I was thinking over some of these things in the car this afternoon, this song came on. So very true.
Can't we all relate to this? This is the stuff that just drives us crazy and makes us forget how much we're blessed. It's all just *stuff*. Not earth shattering. Just stuff.
Let me not forget how much I'm blessed!
Three children had dental appointments this week. We went on Tuesday, signed in, and the sweet receptionist gave me "that look" like "um, why are you here? I do not have appointments for your children today." She was right. Oops. Appointments were not Tuesday, they were Wednesday. Alrighty.
We show up on again on Wednesday. We left the appointments with one child just fine, one with two minor cavities, and one with a referral to an oral surgeon. Faaaaabulous. If you know my kids, I'm sure you can guess which is which, because that seems to be always the way it works around here.
Is the oral surgeon in our network? Ha. Haha.
So I'm forseeing a child who is surprisingly not in pain yet, but soon will be. I'm also forseeing financial destruction. Okay, that's a *bit* of an exaggeration. Our insurance will cover some of it and there are sufficient funds to cover the rest without eating too many servings of beans and rice over the next few weeks.
So today I get out of bed really early feeling kind of yucky. There's not time for that though! Need to take the little one to preschool, need to meet with a friend for a little while, need to grab the girls and go to the little one's Valentine's party, and hello? SOME schoolwork needs to be done. Oh, and I guess we need to eat and then rush off to consult with the oral surgeon. My cost estimate was off. By a lot. And not in the good way. We get home just in time to get the girls to dance and oh yeah, they have choir tonight too and you CANNOT see my floor and the sink? It would probably be easier to just get water out of the bathroom sink if you're thirsty because there are too many dishes to fit a cup under the tap. And the laundry is piled up? Again? Didn't I just do that? AND WHY, OH HEAVENS WHY, IS THE BATHTUB NOT DRAINING??
May I just have a nap? Please?
And through it all? I found out that I won one of the giveaways on Gussy's blog, something pretty will be coming to my house soon! My friend said "let me just keep your son for an extra hour or two." Jim said "hey, let's go out to dinner tonight." Another friend just plain encouraged my socks off. The girls are sitting here finishing up schoolwork, and giggling. And, our tax refund will be here right when we need to pay for the dental work. I shopped Kohl's clearance sale and bought an $80 jacket for me for $6.99 and it got here today and I LOVE it.
As I was thinking over some of these things in the car this afternoon, this song came on. So very true.
Can't we all relate to this? This is the stuff that just drives us crazy and makes us forget how much we're blessed. It's all just *stuff*. Not earth shattering. Just stuff.
Let me not forget how much I'm blessed!
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Randomness and Thinking Further
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This has just been a weird week. Doesn't seem like Thursday for one thing. Girls finished their schoolwork by 11:00 for another thing. (Yes, it's VERY nice when every class has an easy day on the same day ... but so much less enjoyable when every class has a hard day on the same day!)
The weather forgot that we live in Texas and that we're all a big bunch of weenies when it comes to cold weather. 26 degrees should never happen here. I think that's in my contract somewhere. We had a nice toasty fire the other night until I realize that there is some kind of crazy magnetic attraction that five year old boys have with fires. Let's all be thankful that the night ended with no ER visits. In case anyone was wondering, in the case of little green army men versus fire, the fire wins. Every time. And melted little green army men smell bad. Every time.
(Helpful. That's what I am.)
I am attempting chili again tonight. I have had this unnatural obsession with chili lately. Enough so that I have pleaded with friends to make it for me and have started forwarding my mail to Jason's Deli again. I am now armed with a new recipe and will be trying it tonight. I will keep you posted. Let's hope I'm not disappointed. Again.
If you read this post ... well, all of these thoughts are still rolling around in my head.
I hope I didn't make it sound like I think it's a "one size fits all" type thing and that if you follow the path you believe the Lord is leading you down, life will be all sunshine and happiness. It's still life, still filled with the muck and mire of sin, both our own and the sins of others which affect us.
I do firmly believe that His grace is sufficient for our need, and that His grace is applied where our need is. I also think, though, that we can allow things to get in the way. Fear, doubt, disobedience, rejection, and running ahead of His will can cause His grace to appear insufficient, or not "work" like it should.
I'm still processing my thoughts here ... and can't seem to put them into words yet. I sense a part three coming up soon.
The weather forgot that we live in Texas and that we're all a big bunch of weenies when it comes to cold weather. 26 degrees should never happen here. I think that's in my contract somewhere. We had a nice toasty fire the other night until I realize that there is some kind of crazy magnetic attraction that five year old boys have with fires. Let's all be thankful that the night ended with no ER visits. In case anyone was wondering, in the case of little green army men versus fire, the fire wins. Every time. And melted little green army men smell bad. Every time.
(Helpful. That's what I am.)
I am attempting chili again tonight. I have had this unnatural obsession with chili lately. Enough so that I have pleaded with friends to make it for me and have started forwarding my mail to Jason's Deli again. I am now armed with a new recipe and will be trying it tonight. I will keep you posted. Let's hope I'm not disappointed. Again.
If you read this post ... well, all of these thoughts are still rolling around in my head.
I hope I didn't make it sound like I think it's a "one size fits all" type thing and that if you follow the path you believe the Lord is leading you down, life will be all sunshine and happiness. It's still life, still filled with the muck and mire of sin, both our own and the sins of others which affect us.
I do firmly believe that His grace is sufficient for our need, and that His grace is applied where our need is. I also think, though, that we can allow things to get in the way. Fear, doubt, disobedience, rejection, and running ahead of His will can cause His grace to appear insufficient, or not "work" like it should.
I'm still processing my thoughts here ... and can't seem to put them into words yet. I sense a part three coming up soon.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Sufficient Grace
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I have a friend who is going through a major endeavor in her life. She will soon be doubling the size of her family - from three to six children. The current children are young and the new children are also young, with special needs.
Let me be honest here. My brain has been all over the place in trying to wrap around that. On one hand I'm in awe. Not only in awe that they are doing that, but in awe of how the Lord is working out the details. On another hand, the thought "is she crazy?" has crossed my mind a time or two. (Sorry, Jessica. Just being honest here.) On another hand (because I apparently have several hands) I want to get in there and help in whatever way I can. And on another hand, (still being honest here) I'm a little jealous of the adventure, when my life is feeling a little stagnant currently.
Yesterday I was thinking and wondering how many people have been discouraging in their comments to Jessica. (And Josh too, but Jessica is the one I see more frequently and see her mom heart.) I don't mean ugly, I mean people who really do mean well but make comments that bring discouragement to them. Maybe there aren't any, I don't know. As I was thinking about it though, I remember something that a fabulous lady who is now with the Lord said once.
I had commented to her about the grace she showed in a situation that I felt would have had me ready for a rubber room. It was a seriously difficult situation and I remember feeling that if I had to deal with it, I would have given up. I will never forget what she said though:
She said "His grace is sufficient for ME in the situations to which He has called ME. His grace is sufficient for YOU in the situations to which He has called YOU."
Wow. Ever looked at someone going through something that you think would just kill you, and yet they survive? Scarred and hurt, maybe, but still the Lord brings them through? That's His sufficient grace, and it was applied to them in their situation. We don't understand it because it wasn't applied to us in their situation. His grace is sufficient for our need, rather than just blanket grace thrown out. It's personal.
Isn't that awesome? :)
Let me be honest here. My brain has been all over the place in trying to wrap around that. On one hand I'm in awe. Not only in awe that they are doing that, but in awe of how the Lord is working out the details. On another hand, the thought "is she crazy?" has crossed my mind a time or two. (Sorry, Jessica. Just being honest here.) On another hand (because I apparently have several hands) I want to get in there and help in whatever way I can. And on another hand, (still being honest here) I'm a little jealous of the adventure, when my life is feeling a little stagnant currently.
Yesterday I was thinking and wondering how many people have been discouraging in their comments to Jessica. (And Josh too, but Jessica is the one I see more frequently and see her mom heart.) I don't mean ugly, I mean people who really do mean well but make comments that bring discouragement to them. Maybe there aren't any, I don't know. As I was thinking about it though, I remember something that a fabulous lady who is now with the Lord said once.
I had commented to her about the grace she showed in a situation that I felt would have had me ready for a rubber room. It was a seriously difficult situation and I remember feeling that if I had to deal with it, I would have given up. I will never forget what she said though:
She said "His grace is sufficient for ME in the situations to which He has called ME. His grace is sufficient for YOU in the situations to which He has called YOU."
Wow. Ever looked at someone going through something that you think would just kill you, and yet they survive? Scarred and hurt, maybe, but still the Lord brings them through? That's His sufficient grace, and it was applied to them in their situation. We don't understand it because it wasn't applied to us in their situation. His grace is sufficient for our need, rather than just blanket grace thrown out. It's personal.
Isn't that awesome? :)
Friday, December 31, 2010
New Year's Eve
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So, it's New Year's Eve ... and I've got nuthin'. I keep feeling like I should post some resolutions ... or let's call them what they really are: promises I don't intend to keep. Just keeping it real. Of course, as always, I want to be healthier, save more, spend more time in the Word, be kinder, be less lazy ... you know the drill. All things that will go really well for a day or two, some may even last for a month. I'm so thankful that the Lord's mercies are new every morning, and I don't have to do a total life makeover in a day, and once I mess up, I'm "off the hook" for 357 days until next New Year's rolls around.
There were some definite successes and failures for 2010. To be honest, I'm pretty happy about closing the door on 2010, and well, I'll just leave it at that.
We've started some habits this year that I definitely want to continue:
- I'm really enjoying the way our school schedule is working out this year. Planning for a month in pencil and then week by week in pen works for me and seems to be working for the kids as well.
- We are really making an effort to be more frugal (and healthy!) with our eating. I am making a concerted effort to use leftovers - seriously - just ask the kids how many times we've had turkey this week!
- We are doing so much better in the "keeping the house neat" category. I have slacked off a little over the last few months and need to pick that up again, but for the most part, we really are doing better there. I'd love to go to bed every night with the house picked up. I've told the family that I start out much better waking up to a clean house, and when mama starts off happy, it goes better for everyone. ;)
- I've just finished a pretty in-depth Bible study and really enjoyed getting into that habit again. I'm looking forward to starting a new one soon.
I think rather than focus this year on all of the things I want to change, I'd rather be thankful for the positive changes that were made in 2010. There will be more to come, and some definite changes that need to be made, but rather than a list of do's and don't's for 2011, I think I'd rather start from where I am and see where the Lord leads me.
:)
There were some definite successes and failures for 2010. To be honest, I'm pretty happy about closing the door on 2010, and well, I'll just leave it at that.
We've started some habits this year that I definitely want to continue:
- I'm really enjoying the way our school schedule is working out this year. Planning for a month in pencil and then week by week in pen works for me and seems to be working for the kids as well.
- We are really making an effort to be more frugal (and healthy!) with our eating. I am making a concerted effort to use leftovers - seriously - just ask the kids how many times we've had turkey this week!
- We are doing so much better in the "keeping the house neat" category. I have slacked off a little over the last few months and need to pick that up again, but for the most part, we really are doing better there. I'd love to go to bed every night with the house picked up. I've told the family that I start out much better waking up to a clean house, and when mama starts off happy, it goes better for everyone. ;)
- I've just finished a pretty in-depth Bible study and really enjoyed getting into that habit again. I'm looking forward to starting a new one soon.
I think rather than focus this year on all of the things I want to change, I'd rather be thankful for the positive changes that were made in 2010. There will be more to come, and some definite changes that need to be made, but rather than a list of do's and don't's for 2011, I think I'd rather start from where I am and see where the Lord leads me.
:)
Monday, December 13, 2010
I have a feeling ...
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... that it's going to be one of THOSE weeks.
You know the ones. The ones where there is too much to do and too little time to squeeze it all in? The ones where you need to make a list to make sure important details are not forgotten? And then you need to make a list to remind you where you put the original list? Yeah, that kind of week.
And the funny thing?
I put all the stuff we have to do on the calendar. THAT calendar. The schedule calendar. Play practices, recital, parade, preschool Christmas program, play performance, end of year parties, etc. Yes, that is all this week.
Oh, and I planned school this week too.
Pardon me for a moment while I ROLL ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING at the absurdity of that. Granted - we don't have anything going on during the day Tuesday and Wednesday, and will likely do some school on those days, but the rest of the days? No way. And truth be told, I will probably be too exhausted on Tuesday to do much of anything other than recover from all the running around we're doing today.
In case you're wondering, this is how you know when your schedule is running you rather than you running your schedule:
If you are a list maker and the words "revise schedule" appear in your to-do list, perhaps your schedule is running you.
Oh well, live and learn, right?
You'll be happy to know that on my to-do list, next to "revise schedule" is the word TUESDAY, because I simply have not had time to do it yet, and don't expect to really have time to work on it today.
My "word" of 2010 was content. (Expect a big blog post on that sometime in the next week or so ... um, maybe next week ... LOL) Perhaps my word of 2011 should be FLEXIBLE.
Everyone will be happy to know that I made a dessert last night and no ER visits were required. ;)
I hope you all have a fabulous day. I hope everyone can squeeze out a few moments during the crazy busyness to reflect on the reason for the season, and just rest and ponder the silent night ... God with us ... revealed to us ... His Name is called Immanuel.
You know the ones. The ones where there is too much to do and too little time to squeeze it all in? The ones where you need to make a list to make sure important details are not forgotten? And then you need to make a list to remind you where you put the original list? Yeah, that kind of week.
And the funny thing?
I put all the stuff we have to do on the calendar. THAT calendar. The schedule calendar. Play practices, recital, parade, preschool Christmas program, play performance, end of year parties, etc. Yes, that is all this week.
Oh, and I planned school this week too.
Pardon me for a moment while I ROLL ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING at the absurdity of that. Granted - we don't have anything going on during the day Tuesday and Wednesday, and will likely do some school on those days, but the rest of the days? No way. And truth be told, I will probably be too exhausted on Tuesday to do much of anything other than recover from all the running around we're doing today.
In case you're wondering, this is how you know when your schedule is running you rather than you running your schedule:
If you are a list maker and the words "revise schedule" appear in your to-do list, perhaps your schedule is running you.
Oh well, live and learn, right?
You'll be happy to know that on my to-do list, next to "revise schedule" is the word TUESDAY, because I simply have not had time to do it yet, and don't expect to really have time to work on it today.
My "word" of 2010 was content. (Expect a big blog post on that sometime in the next week or so ... um, maybe next week ... LOL) Perhaps my word of 2011 should be FLEXIBLE.
Everyone will be happy to know that I made a dessert last night and no ER visits were required. ;)
I hope you all have a fabulous day. I hope everyone can squeeze out a few moments during the crazy busyness to reflect on the reason for the season, and just rest and ponder the silent night ... God with us ... revealed to us ... His Name is called Immanuel.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Christmas? Bring it on.
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The Thanksgiving leftovers are all eaten and the thankfulness is all gone. It's time for the season of greed, which creeps up closer and closer every year. I really prefer some time between the thankfulness and the greed, but with stores enticing buyers with fabulous sales earlier and earlier every year, eventually Thanksgiving will be eclipsed altogether and we'll be left with nothing but the greed. It's sad, isn't it?
And don't think it doesn't affect me too. I wavered all week last week about Black Friday shopping or not. I love me a good bargain, and really I'm a dream for a store. Not only do I love a good bargain, I've also got a fair amount of the impulse shopper in me, so while I'm on the good bargain high, I will certainly find thirty not so great bargains that I simply must have as well. Hair beader? Gotta have it. 23 different flavors of lip gloss which one nameless child will find and probably use as glue to stick artwork to the wall? Definitely need it.
I think for the first time in my life, I am actually seeing this about myself and am REALLY trying to make a list, get what I need, and not be tempted. Yesterday I went to one of my favorite stores with a very short list of things to buy. Although it was tempting, I actually left with the things on my list and only the things on my list. Success. I do suspect it had a little bit to do with the three children with me and yucky weather and a growling stomach, but hey, whatever it takes, right?
I was serious when I said a week or so ago that I want it to be different this year. We are debt free and I wish to remain that way. We have a lot of stuff (which is getting pared down - Woot!!) and we really do not need to bring a lot more STUFF into this house. The little one is now five and my plan today while the girls are doing their schoolwork and he is at school is to continue to sort through his toys and find new homes for the remaining baby and little boy toys that are hiding out in his dresser.
I am about 75% done with the Christmas shopping. As always, there are several gifts that I am very excited to give this year. I really do enjoy shopping and trying to find something special for the people I love. I love knowing what my children want and finding it for them, and I love surprising them as well. I love Christmas!
We are going to be reading a series of Advent or Jesse Tree devotions this year. We did this several years ago and then kind of let if fall by the wayside the last few years. I don't know why - we all loved it. I love that it gives us a focus, to see the Lord's prophesy in motion, to take some quiet moments with the children to let them know that trees and presents are fun - and there's nothing wrong with them - but to see that there is more to the story. So much more. I want this to become a tradition for us, not just a "hey, let's do that devotion thing again this year!" but a deep desire to enjoy the season and to reflect on the deeper meanings. If you are looking for that too with your family, here are two fabulous helps - with devotions and plans and ornaments. I don't know about you, but I'm BUSY this time of year. We don't stop school, and December is always full of extra activities, so anything that makes planning easy on me is a good thing.
My blogging friend Maggie has this Advent devotional guide: Celebrating the Season - An Advent Study
And then there is this one also, by Ann Voskamp: A Jesus Advent Celebration
I'm sure there are hundreds more out there too, but these two are both fabulous.
So, Christmas? Bring it on. I'm ready. Let's do it a little differently this year and REALLY celebrate Christmas.
And don't think it doesn't affect me too. I wavered all week last week about Black Friday shopping or not. I love me a good bargain, and really I'm a dream for a store. Not only do I love a good bargain, I've also got a fair amount of the impulse shopper in me, so while I'm on the good bargain high, I will certainly find thirty not so great bargains that I simply must have as well. Hair beader? Gotta have it. 23 different flavors of lip gloss which one nameless child will find and probably use as glue to stick artwork to the wall? Definitely need it.
I think for the first time in my life, I am actually seeing this about myself and am REALLY trying to make a list, get what I need, and not be tempted. Yesterday I went to one of my favorite stores with a very short list of things to buy. Although it was tempting, I actually left with the things on my list and only the things on my list. Success. I do suspect it had a little bit to do with the three children with me and yucky weather and a growling stomach, but hey, whatever it takes, right?
I was serious when I said a week or so ago that I want it to be different this year. We are debt free and I wish to remain that way. We have a lot of stuff (which is getting pared down - Woot!!) and we really do not need to bring a lot more STUFF into this house. The little one is now five and my plan today while the girls are doing their schoolwork and he is at school is to continue to sort through his toys and find new homes for the remaining baby and little boy toys that are hiding out in his dresser.
I am about 75% done with the Christmas shopping. As always, there are several gifts that I am very excited to give this year. I really do enjoy shopping and trying to find something special for the people I love. I love knowing what my children want and finding it for them, and I love surprising them as well. I love Christmas!
We are going to be reading a series of Advent or Jesse Tree devotions this year. We did this several years ago and then kind of let if fall by the wayside the last few years. I don't know why - we all loved it. I love that it gives us a focus, to see the Lord's prophesy in motion, to take some quiet moments with the children to let them know that trees and presents are fun - and there's nothing wrong with them - but to see that there is more to the story. So much more. I want this to become a tradition for us, not just a "hey, let's do that devotion thing again this year!" but a deep desire to enjoy the season and to reflect on the deeper meanings. If you are looking for that too with your family, here are two fabulous helps - with devotions and plans and ornaments. I don't know about you, but I'm BUSY this time of year. We don't stop school, and December is always full of extra activities, so anything that makes planning easy on me is a good thing.
My blogging friend Maggie has this Advent devotional guide: Celebrating the Season - An Advent Study
And then there is this one also, by Ann Voskamp: A Jesus Advent Celebration
I'm sure there are hundreds more out there too, but these two are both fabulous.
So, Christmas? Bring it on. I'm ready. Let's do it a little differently this year and REALLY celebrate Christmas.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Thankfulness A - Z
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I am totally stealing this from my friend Shabby Shae! What a cool idea! I'm taking an easy week in every area of my life ... except the laundry, darn it, because the laundry just isn't going to do itself ... and blogging falls into the easy week category. I'm glad for friends whose posts I can copy! ;)
A -- for apple and sausage stuffing, which I will be having this week
B -- for my sweet boy who has made me LOVE being mom to a boy!
C -- for crisp, cool fall days. I hope we have some again soon.
D -- for daughters who are sweet and kind and giggly.
E -- for eggs, which I have just about every morning for breakfast.
F -- for fabulous friends who have been such a blessing to me.
G -- for my grandparents, even though they are all gone now. I am so thankful to have had them in my life.
H -- for a husband who realizes when my limit is reached and steps in.
I -- for in-laws who make me laugh and understand my husband a little better.
J -- for Jelly Belly jelly beans.
K -- for kids - kids of all ages! There is a certain delight in every age, and somehow I can say every different stage has been my favorite.
L -- for lunches with friends.
M -- for mocha light frappuccinos from Starbucks.
N -- for nieces and nephews, who are a total joy to my life.
O -- for oreos, which I've had too many of lately. Hm, maybe I'm NOT so thankful for them!
P -- for parents who love each other and love me.
Q -- for quiet Wednesday nights when I am completely alone for two hours.
R -- for rest!
S -- for really nice sheets.
T -- for taking the week off of school this week, and for being far enough along to do so guilt free!
U -- for unsweet tea with raspberry from Sonic.
V -- for vacations! I love to plan vacations and relive the memories after.
W -- for warm baths on cold nights. Again, if we ever had any cold nights. ;)
X -- for eXtreme Bible study, Beth Moore-style, which is giving me an entirely new perspective on lots of things.
Y -- for You! I feel like I've gotten to know you through both my blog and yours, and I love that! (and yeah, I kind of stole Micah's answer here.)
Z -- for my zoom lens, which allows me to get good pics of my kids without them realizing it.
A -- for apple and sausage stuffing, which I will be having this week
B -- for my sweet boy who has made me LOVE being mom to a boy!
C -- for crisp, cool fall days. I hope we have some again soon.
D -- for daughters who are sweet and kind and giggly.
E -- for eggs, which I have just about every morning for breakfast.
F -- for fabulous friends who have been such a blessing to me.
G -- for my grandparents, even though they are all gone now. I am so thankful to have had them in my life.
H -- for a husband who realizes when my limit is reached and steps in.
I -- for in-laws who make me laugh and understand my husband a little better.
J -- for Jelly Belly jelly beans.
K -- for kids - kids of all ages! There is a certain delight in every age, and somehow I can say every different stage has been my favorite.
L -- for lunches with friends.
M -- for mocha light frappuccinos from Starbucks.
N -- for nieces and nephews, who are a total joy to my life.
O -- for oreos, which I've had too many of lately. Hm, maybe I'm NOT so thankful for them!
P -- for parents who love each other and love me.
Q -- for quiet Wednesday nights when I am completely alone for two hours.
R -- for rest!
S -- for really nice sheets.
T -- for taking the week off of school this week, and for being far enough along to do so guilt free!
U -- for unsweet tea with raspberry from Sonic.
V -- for vacations! I love to plan vacations and relive the memories after.
W -- for warm baths on cold nights. Again, if we ever had any cold nights. ;)
X -- for eXtreme Bible study, Beth Moore-style, which is giving me an entirely new perspective on lots of things.
Y -- for You! I feel like I've gotten to know you through both my blog and yours, and I love that! (and yeah, I kind of stole Micah's answer here.)
Z -- for my zoom lens, which allows me to get good pics of my kids without them realizing it.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
All I Want For Christmas ...
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Conversation that took place in my house a few days ago:
Husband: Hey Mel? What do you want for Christmas?
Me: I think I'd like a goat. Maybe a couple of chickens too.
Husband: O_o
another conversation that took place in my house a few days ago:
Me: Kids, we have too many toys. We need to scale back. When you are incapable of cleaning your rooms because there is too much stuff for the space, that says to me that we need to a) get rid of a few things and b) not bring so much stuff into the house. So, I want you to really think about what you want for Christmas this year. Please don't give me a list with every toy you see advertised on it, because you will be sorely disappointed come Christmas morning.
Girls: O_o
Boy: Watch me jump off the furniture! (sometimes the little one has some focus issues!)
Me: Just think ... if we do a smaller Christmas, we could use some of what we would have spent to buy a goat and chickens and REALLY help a family in need. You have so much stuff, and these people do not even have sufficient food to eat!
Girls: O_o (asking each others in concerned whispers "is she serious?")
Boy: YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF CHRISTMAS!!
Okay, so a little artistic license was used in these conversations, although the "You are not the boss of Christmas!" was shouted at me last night by a certain five year old.
I think the Lord placed the World Vision catalog in my hand within five minutes of me discovering that the girls COULD NOT clean their room because they had more stuff than space for a reason though. I got to thinking. What if we took $100 out of our Christmas budget and gave it away? To World Vision for a goat and two chickens, or to a friend's adoption fund, or to my friends raising orphans in Kenya, or to the Salvation Army, or to a family that needs shoes and coats for their kids, or maybe a Christmas dinner, or toys to put under their tree? Would that $100 really be missed by our family? In light of the difference it could make in the life of another family?
My poor children do not get it yet. They've led pretty sheltered lives and are pretty much used to having what they want. I wouldn't necessarily call them spoiled brats, but we haven't done a fabulous job teaching them gratitude, and teaching them how very much they have, because we haven't made an effort to live with gratitude and to live like we are aware of how very much we have. I know how hard it is when you're bombarded with advertisements everywhere that show you just how much more STUFF is out there and how you need it ALL! I'm right there with them. I saw an ad last night for a coffee maker I decided that I really need. It caused an immediate dislike for the coffee maker I have, which works fine, which I seriously use about ten times a year. So yeah, I'm a rational adult who KNOWS that I'm richer than a significant portion of the world just by having sufficient (ahem, MORE than sufficient) food and clean water and a warm bed to sleep in. I know it's hard for kids who don't know that.
I really am serious though. We are going to scale back our own Christmas this year, following the "something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read" principle, and the excess that I would have spent I want to use to bless others. Hopefully the rest of my family will see it as a blessing as well.
May I challenge you to give this Christmas away, as well?
Husband: Hey Mel? What do you want for Christmas?
Me: I think I'd like a goat. Maybe a couple of chickens too.
Husband: O_o
another conversation that took place in my house a few days ago:
Me: Kids, we have too many toys. We need to scale back. When you are incapable of cleaning your rooms because there is too much stuff for the space, that says to me that we need to a) get rid of a few things and b) not bring so much stuff into the house. So, I want you to really think about what you want for Christmas this year. Please don't give me a list with every toy you see advertised on it, because you will be sorely disappointed come Christmas morning.
Girls: O_o
Boy: Watch me jump off the furniture! (sometimes the little one has some focus issues!)
Me: Just think ... if we do a smaller Christmas, we could use some of what we would have spent to buy a goat and chickens and REALLY help a family in need. You have so much stuff, and these people do not even have sufficient food to eat!
Girls: O_o (asking each others in concerned whispers "is she serious?")
Boy: YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF CHRISTMAS!!
Okay, so a little artistic license was used in these conversations, although the "You are not the boss of Christmas!" was shouted at me last night by a certain five year old.
I think the Lord placed the World Vision catalog in my hand within five minutes of me discovering that the girls COULD NOT clean their room because they had more stuff than space for a reason though. I got to thinking. What if we took $100 out of our Christmas budget and gave it away? To World Vision for a goat and two chickens, or to a friend's adoption fund, or to my friends raising orphans in Kenya, or to the Salvation Army, or to a family that needs shoes and coats for their kids, or maybe a Christmas dinner, or toys to put under their tree? Would that $100 really be missed by our family? In light of the difference it could make in the life of another family?
My poor children do not get it yet. They've led pretty sheltered lives and are pretty much used to having what they want. I wouldn't necessarily call them spoiled brats, but we haven't done a fabulous job teaching them gratitude, and teaching them how very much they have, because we haven't made an effort to live with gratitude and to live like we are aware of how very much we have. I know how hard it is when you're bombarded with advertisements everywhere that show you just how much more STUFF is out there and how you need it ALL! I'm right there with them. I saw an ad last night for a coffee maker I decided that I really need. It caused an immediate dislike for the coffee maker I have, which works fine, which I seriously use about ten times a year. So yeah, I'm a rational adult who KNOWS that I'm richer than a significant portion of the world just by having sufficient (ahem, MORE than sufficient) food and clean water and a warm bed to sleep in. I know it's hard for kids who don't know that.
I really am serious though. We are going to scale back our own Christmas this year, following the "something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read" principle, and the excess that I would have spent I want to use to bless others. Hopefully the rest of my family will see it as a blessing as well.
May I challenge you to give this Christmas away, as well?
Monday, November 8, 2010
Rest (part 1)
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This is not a typical Monday post for me. This is not a typical post for anyone I don't think. You know those "processing thoughts as I type" kind of posts? That. I have a lot of thoughts rolling around in my head and I kind of want to journal them as I'm processing them. So here ya go ...
I'm doing a Beth Moore Bible study right now, Breaking Free. I'm only about halfway through, but I'm really wanting it to stick, so I'm trying to really focus on it and figure out exactly what I need to learn from it, and changes I need to make in my life.
This week, one of the things she hit on in the homework was that there are blessings that come from obedience to God. That sounds great, and even makes sense, but what exactly does obedience to God mean? I've been a Christian for a long, long time, so I know what "spiritual disciplines" are, but I'm at a place in my life where I long for *relationship* and I'm struggling a bit with *religion*. I'm pretty good at filling in my checklist and holding it up like a report card to show that I'm doing well. Great, but what is the point if my heart isn't in it? I KNOW the Lord can speak to me even if I'm half heartedly reading my Bible, but I want more than that. I really want to WANT TO, if that makes sense; not just for my checklist, but for my heart.
Okay, so those are the thoughts that were rolling around in my mind as I went into Bible study.
We got started, and she immediately took us to Matthew 11:28-30.
I don't know if these verses do to you what they do to me. For me, every time I read them, there is a sigh of relief and a feeling of a weight being lifted off of my shoulders. The whole theme of this lesson was rest. You may have noticed that I am a person who puts a lot of pressure on myself, and likely on those around me as well. It's difficult to rest because there's always something that needs to be done. One phrase Beth Moore said has just kind of screamed at me: the captivity of activity. Oh yes. That is where my struggle is.
There is more to this, but this is enough for now. I'll add to it later this week, after I've done a little more processing. I just wanted you to start the week as I am, with a sigh of relief and a weight lifted off of your shoulders.
I'm doing a Beth Moore Bible study right now, Breaking Free. I'm only about halfway through, but I'm really wanting it to stick, so I'm trying to really focus on it and figure out exactly what I need to learn from it, and changes I need to make in my life.
This week, one of the things she hit on in the homework was that there are blessings that come from obedience to God. That sounds great, and even makes sense, but what exactly does obedience to God mean? I've been a Christian for a long, long time, so I know what "spiritual disciplines" are, but I'm at a place in my life where I long for *relationship* and I'm struggling a bit with *religion*. I'm pretty good at filling in my checklist and holding it up like a report card to show that I'm doing well. Great, but what is the point if my heart isn't in it? I KNOW the Lord can speak to me even if I'm half heartedly reading my Bible, but I want more than that. I really want to WANT TO, if that makes sense; not just for my checklist, but for my heart.
Okay, so those are the thoughts that were rolling around in my mind as I went into Bible study.
We got started, and she immediately took us to Matthew 11:28-30.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
I don't know if these verses do to you what they do to me. For me, every time I read them, there is a sigh of relief and a feeling of a weight being lifted off of my shoulders. The whole theme of this lesson was rest. You may have noticed that I am a person who puts a lot of pressure on myself, and likely on those around me as well. It's difficult to rest because there's always something that needs to be done. One phrase Beth Moore said has just kind of screamed at me: the captivity of activity. Oh yes. That is where my struggle is.
There is more to this, but this is enough for now. I'll add to it later this week, after I've done a little more processing. I just wanted you to start the week as I am, with a sigh of relief and a weight lifted off of your shoulders.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
Friday, October 22, 2010
Facebook Plus Breast Cancer
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Allow me to step up on a soap box for a moment.
(why yes, those are my shoes. Do you like them?)
I am scratching my head. Seriously. I get that October is breast cancer awareness month. I'd really be interested in statistics to see if there are more new cases of breast cancer diagnosed in October than in other months. I'd be willing to bet that there are. Reminders are everywhere, to do self exams and to schedule mammograms. I think this is a VERY good thing. I get it, trust me I do.
What I DON'T get though is this:
and this:
Please someone tell me how this is helpful. How are jokes with innuendos helpful to raise awareness? Put a pink ribbon on your page, or post to your wall "HEY, get a checkup!" But I read these and feel like it's all supposed to be a cute joke. Maybe I'm missing the point, but I really don't get it.
Wanna know something interesting? A couple of weeks I received the "purse" message about 12 times. It left me scratching my head, and one of my friends found this post and I linked it. At the time, breast cancer had never affected me in a personal way. It still bothered me to try to figure out how "I like it in the chair" was supposed to help. The next day? The world shifted.
My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer.
There are so many foundations and charities doing real work to treat this disease. Don't like the Susan G. Komen Foundation? No problem, there are hundreds of other organizations raising money for awareness and cures. I could get you a long list if you like. Or on a more personal level? Offer love and support to someone dealing with it. Taking a meal, helping with kids, helping to drive to treatments, offering hope and days that feel less than hopeful, or even giggles on days that aren't especially giggly. Prayers, love, support ... much better than posting an innuendo on a facebook page, doncha' think?
(and FWIW -- I'm not a serious prudish facebook user. Most of my posts are silly and 100% for fun. It just puzzles me that posting 8" :( could possibly help breast cancer research, sufferers, survivors, or those of us who are trying desperately to come up with a way to help, could possibly help anything in any way. Forgive me for venting in this post. I'm just a girl facing something scary.)
(why yes, those are my shoes. Do you like them?)
I am scratching my head. Seriously. I get that October is breast cancer awareness month. I'd really be interested in statistics to see if there are more new cases of breast cancer diagnosed in October than in other months. I'd be willing to bet that there are. Reminders are everywhere, to do self exams and to schedule mammograms. I think this is a VERY good thing. I get it, trust me I do.
What I DON'T get though is this:
This year's game has to do with your handbag/purse, where we put our handbag the moment we get home; for example "I like it on the couch," "I like it on the kitchen counter," "I like it on the dresser." Well u get the idea. Just put your answer as your status (i.e. don't respond to this message, but put it on your status) -- and cut n paste this message and forward to all your FB female friends to their inbox. The bra game made it to the news. Let's get the purse in as well and see how powerful we women really are!!!
and this:
Okay ladies here is another breast cancer awareness status game. Thanks to all of you that have been playing so far! Copy and paste this email and send it to all the ladies on your friend list NO MEN! This time we are going to post your shoe size followed by the word "inches" and a sad face. This will really have all the men asking questions! Remember the whole bra thing made the national news! Let's do this again!
Please someone tell me how this is helpful. How are jokes with innuendos helpful to raise awareness? Put a pink ribbon on your page, or post to your wall "HEY, get a checkup!" But I read these and feel like it's all supposed to be a cute joke. Maybe I'm missing the point, but I really don't get it.
Wanna know something interesting? A couple of weeks I received the "purse" message about 12 times. It left me scratching my head, and one of my friends found this post and I linked it. At the time, breast cancer had never affected me in a personal way. It still bothered me to try to figure out how "I like it in the chair" was supposed to help. The next day? The world shifted.
My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer.
There are so many foundations and charities doing real work to treat this disease. Don't like the Susan G. Komen Foundation? No problem, there are hundreds of other organizations raising money for awareness and cures. I could get you a long list if you like. Or on a more personal level? Offer love and support to someone dealing with it. Taking a meal, helping with kids, helping to drive to treatments, offering hope and days that feel less than hopeful, or even giggles on days that aren't especially giggly. Prayers, love, support ... much better than posting an innuendo on a facebook page, doncha' think?
(and FWIW -- I'm not a serious prudish facebook user. Most of my posts are silly and 100% for fun. It just puzzles me that posting 8" :( could possibly help breast cancer research, sufferers, survivors, or those of us who are trying desperately to come up with a way to help, could possibly help anything in any way. Forgive me for venting in this post. I'm just a girl facing something scary.)
Friday, October 15, 2010
The No Good Horrible Very Bad Day
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Ya know, I'd love to have that book again. I remember reading it as a kid and would like to read it again. There was another one I read over and over too - The Hating Book I think it was called. "I hate hate hated my friend!" Oh how I loved both of those books!
So, yesterday was one of those terrible horrible no good very bad days. And not for any specific reason either. I woke up grumpy. It was a bad hair day. It was cold then it was too hot. The girls were bickering over things that just. don't. matter. I hurt a friend's feelings because I told her something that she was dealing with didn't matter, when clearly it did to her. AND, I spent a long time in the car shuffling kids back and forth.
Not a single one of those things is terribly bad, but by the end of the day, I was ready to kick a puppy. Thankfully there aren't any puppies handy around here, so nobody needs to call PETA or anything.
The thing though? There is some big stuff going on. Serious stuff. That's not what's pushing me over the edge. It's the Cootie game leg left out and the fact that nobody but me knows the great secret of putting toilet paper on the roll.
why? WHY? Why am I endangering puppies over toilet paper?
Today. Today is going to be a happier day. :) I just know it. :) Or maybe it won't be, but I'm going to try my very best to make my attitude better. The puppy population of the world will thank me.
(And since I have your attention, how do you get out of an attitude when it is overtaking your life?)
So, yesterday was one of those terrible horrible no good very bad days. And not for any specific reason either. I woke up grumpy. It was a bad hair day. It was cold then it was too hot. The girls were bickering over things that just. don't. matter. I hurt a friend's feelings because I told her something that she was dealing with didn't matter, when clearly it did to her. AND, I spent a long time in the car shuffling kids back and forth.
Not a single one of those things is terribly bad, but by the end of the day, I was ready to kick a puppy. Thankfully there aren't any puppies handy around here, so nobody needs to call PETA or anything.
The thing though? There is some big stuff going on. Serious stuff. That's not what's pushing me over the edge. It's the Cootie game leg left out and the fact that nobody but me knows the great secret of putting toilet paper on the roll.
why? WHY? Why am I endangering puppies over toilet paper?
Today. Today is going to be a happier day. :) I just know it. :) Or maybe it won't be, but I'm going to try my very best to make my attitude better. The puppy population of the world will thank me.
(And since I have your attention, how do you get out of an attitude when it is overtaking your life?)
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Nehi Grape Summers
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I was just sitting here annoying my husband who is trying to play a game and I keep interrupting him by talking to him. The cat jumped up on my lap and was looking all miffed at me because I wasn't moving to make her more comfortable. This made me think of a sign my grandparents used to have in their antique store:
"This establishment is maintained solely for the comfort and convenience of our cats."
This, of course, made me remember the antique store. I loved that store. Treasures UNTOLD in there, although to be honest, I was more interested in the junk than in the actual good stuff. I think they tried to help us see the difference, but hey, shiny junk is just a lot prettier to a little kid than old looking stuff!
Actually, I'm still quite drawn to shiny junk, and I know there's a spiritual application there, but that will have to be for another day, because that would mean that this post has a point, and it really just plain doesn't.
My grandparents had a coke machine out in front of their store, and I remember at least when I was a little kid, that it dispensed bottles rather than cans. Their store was the only place in the world where I could get Nehi Grape Soda. Thinking back, I'm not even sure I really liked Nehi Grape Soda, but the novelty of being at the antique store and that being the only place I knew of that had Nehi Grape Soda was just the coolest thing ever.
I remember visiting over the summer and my cousin and I hanging out, ostensibly helping, but really in the way, although my grandparents would never have told us that. We'd drink our weight in grape soda and stay underfoot for the whole time we were there. I remember my grandmother told me the code to her pricing - there was a city, and each letter in the name of the city corresponded to a number, so they could put on the price tag, in code, how much they paid for the item. This made bartering easy. (Now I'm racking my brain trying to remember the city name they used ... dad? Do you remember? How many cities have ten letters with no repeats?)
It's funny the things you remember, and the things that stick in your mind, and that something like the cat jumping into my lap can take me back so many years!
I miss my grandparents. :(
"This establishment is maintained solely for the comfort and convenience of our cats."
This, of course, made me remember the antique store. I loved that store. Treasures UNTOLD in there, although to be honest, I was more interested in the junk than in the actual good stuff. I think they tried to help us see the difference, but hey, shiny junk is just a lot prettier to a little kid than old looking stuff!
Actually, I'm still quite drawn to shiny junk, and I know there's a spiritual application there, but that will have to be for another day, because that would mean that this post has a point, and it really just plain doesn't.
My grandparents had a coke machine out in front of their store, and I remember at least when I was a little kid, that it dispensed bottles rather than cans. Their store was the only place in the world where I could get Nehi Grape Soda. Thinking back, I'm not even sure I really liked Nehi Grape Soda, but the novelty of being at the antique store and that being the only place I knew of that had Nehi Grape Soda was just the coolest thing ever.
I remember visiting over the summer and my cousin and I hanging out, ostensibly helping, but really in the way, although my grandparents would never have told us that. We'd drink our weight in grape soda and stay underfoot for the whole time we were there. I remember my grandmother told me the code to her pricing - there was a city, and each letter in the name of the city corresponded to a number, so they could put on the price tag, in code, how much they paid for the item. This made bartering easy. (Now I'm racking my brain trying to remember the city name they used ... dad? Do you remember? How many cities have ten letters with no repeats?)
It's funny the things you remember, and the things that stick in your mind, and that something like the cat jumping into my lap can take me back so many years!
I miss my grandparents. :(
Monday, September 13, 2010
The Fog is Lifting!
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Maybe it will, or maybe it won't, come as a surprise to you to learn that the last few months have not been stellar in the life of Melanie. They just haven't. There have been days when it was a struggle to get out of bed and days when I'm sure my family sat in another room and whispered to themselves that "mama is starting to lose. it."
This blog is kind of strange. On one hand, I think sometimes I put way too much information out there. I mean, my heavens, I have told you people that I sat in the Target parking lot and wondered if I had brushed my teeth that day. Y'all hung with me last year when my life's goal was to keep my plates spinning and I blogged all about everything. Then there have been the last few months, when it was easier to blog pictures and superficial items and not let it get too personal. I don't want to be needy or pathetic, or whatever you want to cal it. I want to be a person who has it all together, and if I don't, I certainly want you to think I do.
All that said, this last summer, I have not had it all together, and I haven't wanted to blog about it. I haven't wanted to blog about anything on a personal level.
Now, though, suddenly the fog that I've been in has lifted. I'm not *there* yet, but the difference between how I feel physically and emotionally now from two months ago is amazing. I can't even tell what has exactly made the change - whether it's that I'm taking a little better care of myself, or doing some things specifically for me now (other than the daily Starbucks run ... KIDDING JIM! I really only go a couple of times a week!), or answered prayer, or getting back into a routine with structure, or what.
I just know that it's really nice to wake up and not try to figure out a way to hide under the bed. It's nice to look at things that need to be done and not feel so overwhelmed. I couldn't believe yesterday - I had a STACK of things to do. We went to church, came home, and I got my things done. A couple of months ago, I would have looked at the list and tried to crawl under the bed.
All of that to say ... the fog is lifting, and I am so thankful!
This blog is kind of strange. On one hand, I think sometimes I put way too much information out there. I mean, my heavens, I have told you people that I sat in the Target parking lot and wondered if I had brushed my teeth that day. Y'all hung with me last year when my life's goal was to keep my plates spinning and I blogged all about everything. Then there have been the last few months, when it was easier to blog pictures and superficial items and not let it get too personal. I don't want to be needy or pathetic, or whatever you want to cal it. I want to be a person who has it all together, and if I don't, I certainly want you to think I do.
All that said, this last summer, I have not had it all together, and I haven't wanted to blog about it. I haven't wanted to blog about anything on a personal level.
Now, though, suddenly the fog that I've been in has lifted. I'm not *there* yet, but the difference between how I feel physically and emotionally now from two months ago is amazing. I can't even tell what has exactly made the change - whether it's that I'm taking a little better care of myself, or doing some things specifically for me now (other than the daily Starbucks run ... KIDDING JIM! I really only go a couple of times a week!), or answered prayer, or getting back into a routine with structure, or what.
I just know that it's really nice to wake up and not try to figure out a way to hide under the bed. It's nice to look at things that need to be done and not feel so overwhelmed. I couldn't believe yesterday - I had a STACK of things to do. We went to church, came home, and I got my things done. A couple of months ago, I would have looked at the list and tried to crawl under the bed.
All of that to say ... the fog is lifting, and I am so thankful!
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Feeding My Children Moldy Bread
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I know this is not news to anyone, but it's tough raising godly children in our world. I suspect that it has been tough raising godly children in ANY world. No matter the outside pressures, the inside nature is still sinful, and in our house, lazy.
We are in a place where my kids are exposed to more culture and media than ever before, particularly my oldest. So now we're faced with choices daily as to what's appropriate and what's not. And I do mean daily. Songs, youtube videos, books, tv shows, movies, magazines ... constant bombardment.
As much as I would like to put my children in a box and only allow the things of which I approve to enter that box, I'm finding that, as great as that strategy sounds, it isn't really possible. They live in the world and are exposed to the world. Plus, how can I teach them to be discerning if I am that much in control of their environment?
So, there's a line to walk here.
I remember a friend had an analogy about eating bread with mold on it. The mold being the negative influences in our lives. How much mold is allowed on bread we eat? If you want a sandwich and the only bread is just a bit moldy, do you try to pick it off and eat the bread anyway or give up on having a sandwich?
I'm not entirely sure what the answer is. I know we have allowed a little mold into our children's diets. Of course I would prefer not to, but truth be told, I've let a little mold into my diet as well. Sometimes even putting jam on that bread and enjoying it. Every now and then even going back for seconds.
I don't WANT to eat moldy bread and I certainly don't want to feed them moldy bread, but sometimes it tastes good, and everyone else is eating moldy bread. Romans 7, anyone?
This is another area where I don't have a ton of wisdom. I am praying for discernment for me, and for my children, and for grace when a little mold seeps in.
If you have any wisdom here, please feel free to share with the class! And, please continue to enter the Same Kind of Different As Me giveaway; it's the post below this one.
We are in a place where my kids are exposed to more culture and media than ever before, particularly my oldest. So now we're faced with choices daily as to what's appropriate and what's not. And I do mean daily. Songs, youtube videos, books, tv shows, movies, magazines ... constant bombardment.
As much as I would like to put my children in a box and only allow the things of which I approve to enter that box, I'm finding that, as great as that strategy sounds, it isn't really possible. They live in the world and are exposed to the world. Plus, how can I teach them to be discerning if I am that much in control of their environment?
So, there's a line to walk here.
I remember a friend had an analogy about eating bread with mold on it. The mold being the negative influences in our lives. How much mold is allowed on bread we eat? If you want a sandwich and the only bread is just a bit moldy, do you try to pick it off and eat the bread anyway or give up on having a sandwich?
I'm not entirely sure what the answer is. I know we have allowed a little mold into our children's diets. Of course I would prefer not to, but truth be told, I've let a little mold into my diet as well. Sometimes even putting jam on that bread and enjoying it. Every now and then even going back for seconds.
I don't WANT to eat moldy bread and I certainly don't want to feed them moldy bread, but sometimes it tastes good, and everyone else is eating moldy bread. Romans 7, anyone?
This is another area where I don't have a ton of wisdom. I am praying for discernment for me, and for my children, and for grace when a little mold seeps in.
If you have any wisdom here, please feel free to share with the class! And, please continue to enter the Same Kind of Different As Me giveaway; it's the post below this one.
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