Sunday, May 3, 2009

Not Me Monday

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This is a brief and to the point "Not Me Monday" because I have NOT overbooked myself with too many things coming and going, and because of that, not only am I short of time, I seem to be short of attention span as well.

This post is brought to you by the following three things, two of which I love. Add the third one though ... and well, you'll see what happens:

TARGET



Those horrible, idiotic, annoying singing hamsters.


And this sweet little boy.


I did not have an awful trip to Target this week. The sweet little boy pictured above has not mastered the art of climbing into and out of the cart, as well as the art of unhooking the strap IF I happen to be quick enough to get it around him. This does not mean for a second that we have to race through the store trying to keep up with the three year old. He does not move much more quickly than I do, by the way.

Target did not have those cute little hamsters on clearance. Why on earth would those darling little things be on clearance? EVERYONE loves how they take the most annoying "stick in your head" songs on earth and sing them in this awful high pitch at volumes that should just not be allowed to the non-hearing impaired. There's just no real reason for these to be on clearance, right? Okay, so there weren't like twelve of these darling little critters sitting on the endcap right by where we needed to be.

My sweet son did not SQUEAL in delight when he saw the aisle we were on and rush in front of us to the endcap and start pushing hamster buttons ... or feet ... or whatever you push to make the vile little monsters start singing. He did not push EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. so that we had a cacophony of annoying songs in squeaky hamster voices that could break glass and certainly make my ears BLEED. And in the span of time it took me to find what I needed, he did not do this approximately 45623618547 times.

I did not at this point start to twitch. The girls did not nervously discuss amongst themselves that their mama had THAT look in her eye. The other unfortunate Target patrons did not start quickly moving away from our area. I did not just grab pastel colored letters when I really needed safari colored letters just to be done and off of that aisle.

I also did not start to seriously contemplate either bursting into tears, OR leaving the boy at Target.

And I also did not start composing this Not Me in my mind on the spot.

Ah ... how we love Target. And the boy.

and by the way ... if any of you local people get any design to go to Target and buy me one of those clearanced out hamsters for my very own ... remember, I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE, my memory is long, and coming up soon, I WILL have some free time in which to come up with a suitable torture gift for you in return.

You do NOT want to play this video:

3 comments:

Jessilynn said...

Thanks for the giggle!

Becky said...

LOL! But what about those devious friends of yours who *aren't* local?? USPS is a wonderful thing...;)

Yvette said...

I DIDN't offer my darling 3 year old to Lori Carl this afternoon..nah I wouldn't do that!! So, I understand WHY you wouldn't consider leaving yours at Target today.