Monday, October 4, 2010

True, Noble, Pure ...

Pin It Anyone who has read here for a while knows that I have STRUGGLED with where to lay down the boundaries, especially with the "in a huge rush to grow up" oldest. The argument usually goes like this:

Mom is uncomfortable with a certain thing. (book, movie, TV show, friendship ... whatever.)
Oldest says please.
Oldest says her friends are allowed to do that certain thing.
Oldest says please.
Oldest says she'll wash the dishes for a month.
Mom is sorely tempted. ;)

And there it sits. On a few things I give in, on a few things I don't, but I neglected more often than not to definitively draw the line, or explain WHY I feel like the line is where it should be.

With some things it's easy. She saw the trailer for Vampires Suck on TV and decided that was a movie she would like to see. I admit, the trailer DID make it look quite funny. I knew there was no way in the world I would allow her to see that movie, but I didn't tell her that. We looked at the trailer, then looked at some reviews. We looked first at the non-Christian reviews, which, predictably, said it was awful. Then we looked at the Christian reviews, which, also predictably, said it was awful. I had her read the review and was thrilled when she looked at me with big eyes and said "OH NO I should NOT be seeing that movie!!" (Of course then she went on a campaign to state that no one should see it ... another post, another day.) That issue was solved.

With some things it's not so easy. There is a tv show that she enjoys, that had me wavering over allowable or not. I DID let her watch it some last year, and now I regret that. I was feeling convicted over what I was exposing my child to, and finally decided last week that the show was something we needed to not have in our lives. The argument began.

You let me watch it last year!
I love that show!
My friends watch it!
This is so unfair!
You don't want me to have any fun!

Sigh. I don't want my child to hate me. It's so tempting to give in just for the peace around here.

But, if I do that, what am I allowing her to dwell her mind on? I learned from the whole Twilight thing and regret allowing that because for a while, it was taking over our lives. EV.ER.Y.THING. was Twilight related. Conversation, artwork, decoration, music. Seriously everything.

The one good thing that came from that is that it became a great example as to why we allow what we allow, and why we draw the boundaries where we do. She knows that I was terribly uncomfortable about the vampire obsession that was starting to take over around here. Finally I was able to get through to her that I didn't personally think the book was BAD. I didn't think it was a sin for her to read it. My problem was that her mind was seeming to dwell on it.

True, noble, pure, right, lovely, admirable, excellent, praiseworthy ... think upon such things.

(to be continued tomorrow)

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